From the MACBook of the Yogini
Bree’s Space
When the recycling is overflowing with discarded wrapping paper, and the refrigerator is overflowing with leftovers; my annual melancholy mood presents itself. This year was even more difficult since we just came back from beautiful, Caribbean sunshine to the darkness & dampness of Maryland’s December.
Although statistically, suicide & depression rates do not increase during the holiday season, (contrary to popular belief), the holidays can still be a time of stress, anxiety and frustration. And after the presents are opened, the parties are over, and the numbers on the scale have increased, it is natural to feel a little let-down; both physically and emotionally.
December 31st signifies and ending for me. Yes, January 1st is a fresh, new year. New beginnings and a clean slate represent possibilities and unknown potential. Yet, the close of the year also reminds me that I’m another year older, my time on this earth has been reduced, and my children have lost a little more of their innocence.
In addition to the emotional turmoil of year-end; this year I’m also faced with the few pounds I’ve gained resulting from cruise ship dining and homemade holiday cookies. As well as the utter exhaustion from traveling to family gatherings, laundering the suitcases packed with sandy clothes, and completing 2 weeks worth of makeup homework with my 8th grader. Not being attentive to health, diet & exercise, coupled with the emotional loss of another year is definitely a negative combination, which can wreak havoc on the most well-balanced individual.
So, how do I deal with this challenging time? How do I make peace with my perceived losses and gains, and find balance and harmony in the new year?
Become the third party observer.
Acknowledge exactly where you are, and accept it. By seeing this cycle repeat itself in my life every year, I know what to expect. I sit back and say, “Here comes that feeling of loss that presents itself every year. I know what it feels like, I know it will go away eventually. I don’t have to identify with it and attach my identity to it. Believe in the old adage, “This too shall pass.”
Objectively review the past year.
At the beginning of 2007, I wrote a list of goals down, and rated them as to how important each goal was for me to attain. High, Medium or Low. I made each of these goals very measurable. For example, instead of having a goal read, “Become physically fit”, I chose, “Exercise cardio at least 3x per week for an hour.”
I focused on those goals listed as “high”. Several times during the year, I pulled my list to see which goals I had met, and which goals just weren’t that important, and I SCRATCHED them. (Many of the Lows disappeared.)
Now is the time to review the entire list. Seeing the professional and personal progress and growth that I have made this year has really put a positive spin on year-end. It also enables me to easily either carry over some goals that are still in progress, or continue building upon goals that have already been met.
Focus on the Solution, not the Problem.
Thank you Dad, for drilling this phrase into my head from the time I was very small. Make the intellectual assessment that negative emotions will inevitably surface during the post-holiday season. Period. Then, get on with it. Don’t dwell in it.
Instead of wallowing in the sorrow of another year’s loss, focusing on goals and plans for the new year can lift the spirit and provide a new source of purpose. Focus your energies on positive actions, not the negativity of self-pity or blame.
Continuing my volunteer work, getting the kids involved this year, upgrading the web site, increasing my running stats, going “greener”, are all things I can look forward to, and will help me get out of the seasonal doldrums.
Create Outlets
~ Intellectual - solve puzzles, read a NON fiction book, alphabetize your DVD’s or recipes, increase your vocabulary with a new word a day, focused concentration
~ Creative - cook up a organic, healthy meal, start a website, take some landscape photos, paint, journal, write poetry, woodwork, ride a bike/motorcycle
~Physical - exercise: yoga, run or walk, rake leaves or mow the lawn, play with the kids, even on the playground
Cultivate Gratitude
Looking over the past year, and how fortunate I’ve been makes me so grateful for my life and family. So many wonderful things have happened this past year. So many new opportunities and learning experiences.
Being grateful enables us to bring peace and harmony into our everyday lives. A heart filled with gratitude has a hard time finding room for anger or resentment. It allows us to be content with what we have and who we are; and rids us of jealousy, feelings of entitlement and envy.
Cultivate Acceptance
Accept reality. In other words “accept the things I cannot change, change the things I can, and have the wisdom to know the difference”.
It goes something like this:
Another year is gone. It’s cold & dark outside. Everyone is getting older, and death is imminent.
(Sounds pretty bleak so far, doesn’t it?? No wonder we experience “the blues”.)
None of that can be changed, so why should it cause suffering and pain? Why agonize over things which we have no control? Accept reality as it is, without trying to avoid it, ignore or dismiss it, deny it. By doing so, we can utilize all that wasted energy on something positive, tangible and meaningful.
All we have is today. There is no yesterday, or no tomorrow. What can I do NOW to give my life meaning & purpose? How can I best embrace THIS moment so I can life it to it’s fullest potential?
When I ask myself these questions, it usually always stems back to two things: Family & Helping Others. Those two things I can give myself to, unconditionally, and always feel fulfilled after doing so.
I hold my girls tighter, use all my five senses to absorb them and be present in that moment; knowing that it will never be back. I go out of my way to assist someone otherwise ignored by multitudes of others; knowing that one action can change lives.
So, I guess the post-holiday blues do serve some purpose. They enable us to review & assess the past year, be thankful for it and set some goals & plans for the year to come. Being mindful and aware of these challenges enable us to grasp life in the moment, be ever-present and live our lives to the fullest.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Post Holiday Blues
